90210 Recap – Dude, Where’s My Husband?

Season 5, Episode 17
Dude, Where’s My Husband?

Either the writers are “Clueless” and totally titled this episode after the wrong movie, or the show couldn’t get the rights to name it after The Hangover. But whatever the movie title reference, “Dude, Where’s My Husband?” was an amusing little spoof of the infamous buddy tale of trying to piece together the events of a drunken night. Except it took place in 90210-land with the ladies.

The Real Divorcees of Beverly Hills. Naomi is looking like a wreck and it does not go unnoticed by her friends. She has stopped plucking her eyebrows and she is wearing normal people clothes (i.e. t-shirt and sweats). Drastic times call for drastic measures—so Ade, Annie and Silver decide to step in and cheer up their ringleader. Naomi admits that she is down because her divorce to the lovable nerd Max has been finalized, which is the perfect opportunity for a girls night out! They gather at the Offshore-turned-restaurant-turned-bar-turned-I-don’t-know-what-this-place-is-anymore. They toast with shots and then we cut to the next morning with Naomi, in a veil, lying on a raft in her pool and wearing a wedding band. But even more disturbing: Ade has skunk streaks in her hair. How did all of this happen? And who did Naomi marry? The ladies—minus Justin Bartha Annie—all gather to follow the small trail of clues. It leads them to a strip club with risqué photos, a bo-lates (botox + pilates) gym where the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills workout, and finally over to Annie’s where the idiot is trapped in her bathroom [um yeah, a bathroom on the first floor with a giant window]. Upon releasing Annie from her bathtub jail, they all get to see a lovely wedding chapel announcement email on her phone that shows a happy Naomi and…Mark! I was slightly concerned for a moment that the show really did go for it with the incest—especially since Naomi seems to be rather flirty with her long-lost half bro—but thank goodness we quickly learn from Mark that Naomi actually married HERSELF. Yes, apparently she was quite distraught and depressed at the end of the night and reached out to a friend for support. Mark gave her a nice pep talk and Naomi married herself as an act of hope. As Mark fills her in on the interesting end to her night, he admits that he too is divorced and it doesn’t define him. Aaaand they share a nice little sibling hug.

City of Brotherly Love. On a related note, Mark is turning out to be quite the MVB (Most Valuable Bro). You can tell he is related to these kiddos because he also prefers to keep all of his relationships and interactions within one friend circle. First, he decides to have some bro bonding time with Dixon…as it shockingly took these two several weeks to figure out that if Mark is Annie’s half-brother then he is also half-brother to Dixon (well, not biological, but still). The self-titled “Faux Bro” head out for a night on the town and don’t get very far: yup, they go to the Offshore-Restaurant-Bar place that is suffering from an identity crisis. Dixon hits it off with a girl but Mark doesn’t fare too well until Silver strolls in and they have a “deep” connection again. Last week it was “NYC is cool” and this week it is “Nirvana is cool.” Silver tries her hardest not to flirt with Mark since she and Ade had sworn that they would not let this hot guy come between them. But hey, there is no resisting a connection quite like what Mark and Silver share. Silver slips away from the girls early in the night and the two hook-up. At first Silver tries to hide it from Ade, but she quickly comes clean in an effort to be honest with her friend. Ade takes it super well and is very mature. Until .5 seconds after Silver leaves the room and she immediately shows us her crazy face. OMG yes—crazy Ade is baaaaaack. Oh, and Dixon and the random bar girl last for all of two seconds until Dixon “bonds” with his preggo surrogate roomie, Michaela. Yep, much like the original series, you can’t be a part of this group without dating every other person in it.

Out on a ledge. In tonight’s pointless plot line, Navid is going to be framed for the CU cheating scandal. And we don’t care. For some reason Liam cares—even though I totally believed his little speech to the rich boy society that Navid is a total ass. But for whatever bullshit friendship reason, Liam has agreed to help his buddy get evidence that the society is behind the cheating ring by re-joining the rich boy’s club. Part of Liam’s initiation includes him pounding shots and walking on a really high railing. Then, he actually gets to punch Navid a few times…so I guess proving yourself to the society comes with a few perks. Navid plays along (and takes a few hits) since it will help Liam gain the trust of the guys. Oh, and Navid is living in the backroom of the Offshore-Restaurant place. Liam even sort of makes fun of this situation, which I find odd given that Liam used to live in the bar storeroom as well.

Well, that’s it for now, folks. 90210 will be on a several week hiatus and then we come back to the beginning of the end. Five episodes left of 90210!

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