Season 4, Episode 12
O Holly Night
O Holly Night, the bar was brightly shining,
It is the night of 90210’s holiday mirth!
Ah yes, nobody celebrates the Christmas season quite like 9021-Ho. This episode was the gift that kept on giving—we got not one but two serious injuries! Wow, Navid and Liam can be hospital buddies in the New Year. And we had multiple lavish parties. But we also got plenty more plot development that will have to sustain us until 2012.
- MistleNO: Naomi is so busy dressing like Ivanna Trump in preparation for her party planning internship that she rejects Austin’s offer for a kiss under the mistletoe. Yes, that’s right—Naomi is taking this gig seriously. Imagine her surprise when she reports for duty and actually has to do things an intern would do, like get coffee and make copies. And imagine my surprise when Rachel excessively praises her apprentice for doing such a good job—making four copies of a document. Really? Is that all it takes to climb the corporate ladder? In Naomi’s world, yes it is. So, an impressed Rachel assigns Naomi to a very special party…her daughter Holly’s birthday bash. I may steal Holly’s line (since my own birthday was yesterday) and start telling people, “I know…me, Jesus…big month.” Naomi does her best to pretend to be a guest in front of new friend Holly and be an expert staffer in front of Rachel, but it doesn’t take long for Holly to figure out that Naomi not only got her mother’s coveted internship, but also her mother’s coveted affection. Now it’s time for Holly to stop acting nice and start being naughty again. Naomi walks in on her boy Austin shirtless and making out with Holly. Ho Ho Ho!
- Tis the season to be stealing: Oh Annie, you are truly an idiot. At least you had a slight moment of intelligence toward the end, but you were so obnoxious about it that I still wanted to shake you like a bowl full of jelly. You see, Annie casually drives by Jeremy’s pad to investigate getting Marla’s necklace back from him. As luck (or convenient script writing) would have it, she overhears his super telling him to leave his key under his doormat. Her confrontation with Marla’s grandson doesn’t go well and she storms off like a bratty child (probably because she is one). Desperate times call for desperate measures, and she briefly considers accepting sugar daddy Patrick’s invitation to jet off to Hawaii to…uhhh…celebrate the holidays with him and his ‘Hawaii girl.’ I am not going to even relate more of this convo, as vomit chunks are forming in my mouth. In the heat of the moment, Liam and Annie hook up because apparently Liam is into Annie again and now he is all about being her protector and savior—even though he doesn’t know what is troubling her. My favorite moment was Liam’s insistence that he could just ‘sense’ she was not doing OK. Wow Liam, you really know her well! What gave it away? The look on her face that seemed to be a strange mixture of fright and constipation? Annie sends Liam away, claiming he cannot solve her problems (actually, he does have the money you need). So Liam goes to a party in the hills where Brie and her Santa’s Helpers (i.e. escorts) are servicing the partygoers. And that is when Liam learns from Brie that Annie herself is an escort because she needs money. Liam storms off to Patrick’s hotel room and punches him out because that is a mature way to handle things. Meanwhile, Annie proves she is the least mature by making use of that ‘hidden’ key to break into Jeremy’s place and find the necklace she needs to return to the estate. Jeremy is waiting for her, and her only defense is that the necklace belongs to her. Ummmm actually Annie—you SOLD the necklace and Jeremy bought the necklace, fair and square. I think Jeremy sums it up best when he says, “You’re not very bright, are you?” She has enough sense left in her to record their conversation with her phone and email it to her lawyer, which basically proves Jeremy is an ass who hated his grandma. And Annie proves she is now a “rich bitch.” A triumphant Annie makes her exit and leaves a voicemail for Liam. Unfortunately, Liam is on his motorcycle and gets distracted by his own shirtless ad. A car hits him and it looks pretty bad. The female driver does get out of her car, but when she notices Liam is the dude from the ad (seriously???) she reports it as a hit and run. Why must Liam always suffer from encounters with the most idiotic women?
- Deck the Halls…and Navid: Liam isn’t the only one poised to spend the New Year in some serious physical therapy. Tonight, Navid prepared for his big sting operation to finally get his uncle put away. He even did some role-playing with that cop, who I am still not convinced isn’t a teenager herself. It seemed pretty clear that Kat wanted to do some other kinds of role-playing with Navid, but he remained committed to working things out with Silver. As anyone would have guessed, Navid’s nerves totally botched the illegal operation because he acted super suspicious. After his uncle took off and Kat fled the scene in her undercover car (sooooo…she was ONLY backup he was going to have???) the bad guys came back around and beat the crap out of Navid. I’ve got to hand it to the make-up department, they really did a good job messing up his face. Silver arrived at the hospital in time to see the tiny bit of conversation between Navid and his lady cop, where they discuss how they care for each other. Of course she missed the part where Navid told Kat that he loves Silver. Too late, since Silver apparently just cannot be single for the holidays. She sped over to her new boy’s house and fully committed to their oh-so-intellectual-and-truthful relationship, even though he comes with the baggage of a separated wife and a child.
- Silent Night: Dixon is practically giddy this holiday season between being out of rehab and his new relationship with Ade. In fact, Liam begins to wonder, “You using again? Because you seem a little too happy about this tree!” Nope—Dixon is just full of tidings from Paris and great joy over having created an awesome new track combining Ade’s song and his music. He even presents her the song as a gift…a gift that she turns off immediately. She is upset that he STOLE her very personal song to commercialize it, which I thought was hilarious karma given that last year she stole a dead guy’s song to build her own pop star career. Speaking of the ghosts of Adrianna’s past, remember how she had that baby way back in the first year of this show? Well, I actually did forget until the writers reminded us that Adrianna still thinks of the baby she gave up and wonders if it was a mistake. That is why the song was so special to her—it was about her baby. Dixon is supposed to perform the song at the bar that night, but rather than make Ade more angry or simply go silent, he sings a ridiculous apology song he makes up on the fly called “I messed up.” Ade forgives him and even tells him she wants to collaborate with him on music, as long as they don’t get carried away by drugs or money this time. I guess we’ll see how long that promise holds out, given their track records.
How did you enjoy the festivities this year on 90210’s holiday episode? Was Ivy already supposed to be on that photo-safari? And how great was it that Navid ‘forgot’ Silver was half-Jewish, despite the fact that she goes by her last name—SILVER.