Boy oh boy! Teddy came out of a closet and Silver went into one! Naomi came down from her spiritual high and Ivy got actual high! Once again, a lot happened in 90210-land in tonight’s episode, “All About a Boy.” And, my comparison of Naomi’s plotline to the original series’ Kelly Taylor getting sucked into Professor’s Finley’s cult turned out to be spot on. In both cases, each naïve and recently traumatized girl (Kelly being caught in a fire and Naomi being a rape victim) resulted in them being easy prey for conniving and money-grabbing spiritual gurus looking for wealthy young girls to fund their projects. The big difference? Kelly’s entrance into her cult and eventual breakout gradually built for most of a season. Naomi, on the other hand, entered her cult last week and snapped out of it this week. These kids today—in a cult one second and out of it the next—whatever happened to sticking to a cause!
- Namaste Bitches!: Naomi has been highly enjoyable to watch this season—you can tell how much fun Annalynne McCord is having with her character’s plotlines. The other week she got to beat her rapist senseless and threaten him with hairspray and a knife. Last week she got to get in touch with her feelings in a sweat lodge. And this week she got to dress in white ponchos and flowers while chanting at a guru party in the dessert. Naomi really let herself be swayed by her new guru—she is ‘off the reservation’ in more ways than one. But, it does make sense she would cling to this new lifestyle given everything this girl has been through (and lord knows she doesn’t have any family around to support her). Plus, as Silver and Ade put it, her new zen-like rituals are healthier than her other habits, “like sex in tanning beds.” Naomi believes her guru’s b.s. that she is a “golden fruit” and on a higher spiritual plane than most others. Which can be translated into: fork over your money to help your guru build a new wellness center. When Naomi finally snaps to it and realizes the truth about her con-artist guru, it may be too late to get her money back. But, lucky for us, it is not too late for Naomi to give an awesome speech at the party: “Take your mantras and your yoga and your shiny tree of life and shove it up your ashram.” On second thought, I think the guru may have been onto something—Naomi should lead some kind of kick-ass self-empowerment group!
- Navid, Silver, Ade…and one creepy Iguana: OK, what was up with the large iguana in Navid’s room? Maybe Mr. Porn-King Shirazi didn’t actually flee back to Iran…maybe the iguana ate him! Anyways, Navid and Silver are all over each other every chance they get. Except Navid still can’t get up the nerve to end things with Ade. Finally—FINALLY—he reaches his breaking (up) point when Ade admits she is only using her “I want my baby back” sob story to re-energize her fallen career. Once she lands a reality show, she is all smiles again…and that is when Navid finally tells her what a shallow, self-centered and horrible person she is. It was so awesome I almost wished he had saved it for her reality show to film. Kudos to Navid for also telling his bros that there is no way Ade could actually be given her baby back, given that she is a “high school drop-out and recovering drug addict.” Ade, not one to get the hint, still tries desperately to rekindle their relationship by being a slut. Navid rejects her advances (thank goodness) but Adrianna secretly finds a girl’s earring on his bedroom floor that happens to belong to the girl hiding in his closet—her bff Silver! I fear for Navid and Silver—we all know Ade is going to make their lives a living hell.
- The importance of being Annie: Why on earth anyone would consciously want to be like Annie is beyond me, but cousin Emily is clearly off her rocker. After beginning her sabotaging last episode, Emily put on her sweet apologetic face again to make amends. Annie was a bit preoccupied, though, because—spoiler alert—apparently Annie is still doing that theater internship back from the very beginning of the season that we have not seen since her boss wanted to buy her (fertile) eggs to have a baby. Yep, you read that right. Now this boss is giving her the opportunity to audition for The Importance of Being Earnest…and guess who is ready to swoop in and steal the part? First Emily ruins Annie’s audition chances by dropping the major bombshell news that her mom is dating Mr. Matthews just moments before Annie takes the stage. Then, she convinced Annie’s boss to let her audition, and Emily learns at the end of the episode that she got the part. Ironically, Annie’s best acting occurred when she told her mom that she was happy if her mom was happy dating Matthews, and then recounted just how horrible her audition was. I can’t wait to see Annie lose it when she finds out Emily ended up with the part!
- Ivy learns the art of “meditation”: At Naomi’s guru’s recommendation, Ivy tries meditation to get over her new fear of the water after almost drowning last week. When that doesn’t work after five minutes, she turns to weed. Ivy has, like, a totally tubular experience surfing while high and wins the competition for her team. The real HIGHlight (pun intended) of this storyline was Ivy being stoned at Naomi’s party. When Teddy and Ian walk in together, hand in hand, her reaction of “whoooaaaa” was priceless.
- Teddy comes out of the closet…but loses his boyfriend: Teddy and Ian apparently spend their winter break together in Colorado, but Teddy is still not ready for the world to know. Unfortunately, he quickly learns someone has photographic evidence and is blackmailing him to keep his secret. Even though Teddy suspects Dixon told someone, it was pretty obvious (at least to me) that it was Ian all along who planted the blackmail documents to get Teddy to finally come out in the open. We have been waiting all season for Teddy to come out, and I actually really liked how the show handled it. Even though there was the lingering threat of blackmail, that was NOT what ultimately motivated him to tell his friends. It was actually a well-done and rather moving conversation with Silver, who had guessed his secret. Silver expressed her love for him as a friend and person, and helped him feel accepted. And I thought Teddy did a great job of expressing his fear of others not being comfortable with him because he is not comfortable with himself. It was nice to see Teddy feel so free and happy, and that much crueler to see him learn that Ian had been so underhanded and dishonest by being the one who planted the blackmail photos in his locker. Poor Teddy—the day he comes out of the closet, he has to break up with his first boyfriend.
What were your favorite moments? Was it worth the wait for Teddy to come out to his friends? And can Ivy be high all the time—I find her character so much more enjoyable!